Llllllllllllip chap

Prior to beginning my daily trek to work, I pondered what could possibly be the topic of my upcoming post. But as I walked alongside millions of New Yorkers, I encountered a woman who became my muse and ultimately, the topic of this post...

This lady obviously has a vendetta against the makers of carmex because her lips were undoubtedly the most chapped i've had the misfortune of ever seeing on a human face.

I kid you not...as she turned to me, her lips cried out for the tingling sensation of carmex; they yearned for that cold paste along those crusty lips. I was almost at the point of just giving her my carmex but as anyone who's ever used carmex before knows, that sh*t is addictive - and I surely couldn't go a whole day without it.

So the moral of this story is: Invest in carmex. It's only like a dollar or so at your neighborhood pharmacy. Don't allow your lips to look like corduroy wrinkles. Its not remotely attractive. That is all.

-JC

HOs

After much thought, I've concluded that it's time to start going topsy-turvy with the human language. That's right, I'm going to alter the status quo by....(drumroll please......)

Redefining the word, "ho." That's right, "ho" -- as in "That stupid ho just pulled out my weave pony tail and used it as one of those nifty little broom things that fits in the groove of the dust pan." 

Why should this term be allowed to cause uprisings across beauty salons and weave shops 'cross the country? Henceforth, the new definition of "ho" will be as follows...

Ho; hoh/noun - Female individual who possesses poise and presents herself in the utmost respectable manner; gentlelady. 

Come on kids, it's up to us to make the world a better place, one "ho" at a time.

- Until next time, don't top off at the pump. It doesn't save you money or give you more gas...it's all in your mind. 

donuts in NYC

Man...I have been craving a Krispy Kreme doughnut since I've gotten to New York City! With over 8 million inhabitants, one would think this city would have a Krispy somewhere 'round here.

But finally! I found a Krispy Kreme! There's only one in this entire city........ and it's next to Weight Watchers. Now that's some irony for ya! HAHAHA. 'Til next time, remain addicted to carmex folks.

- JC

B*tch how bout you back back...

So I was thinking, one of the most annoying things somebody can ever do to me is talk to me...about 3 inches from my face. It's so freakin' uncomfortable. I should not be able to see your tongue wrinkles as you tell me something. Just back back; it's not that hard. Just a thought...

First entry

So I decided to give blogging a try...

We'll see how this goes...